Accidentally ungrateful people

Accidentally ungrateful people

There is a lot of talk about ungrateful people. A lot. I have heard a great deal about the ‘ingratitude of teenagers’, ‘ungrateful youngsters’ or simply ungrateful people in general.

Ingratitude is treason to mankind” – James Thomson

This makes me sad but probably not for the reason you think.

First of all, I would love to turn it around 180 degrees. I want to look at what is happening in me when I start talking about ungrateful people. I start to get have many many different types of thinking that often sets off emotions such as anger, indignation and huge levels of grumpiness. This colours how I see the world and paints a whole bunch of people as “not nice”. My world seems more depressive than before and I feel sad. Just one set of thoughts, if I believe them, can do all of that!

The crazy thing is that this depressive state creates ingratitude by its very nature! I become one of the people that I was raging against!

and this is my main point ……. most so-called ‘ungrateful people’ who display ‘ingratitude’ often do so accidentally. The world is a gift! Yet they cannot see the gifts that are all around them.

Why should we attack the fact that they are accidentally wearing blindfolds? If you saw someone stumbling in the street, terrified of the darkness, not realising they were wearing a blindfold, wouldn’t you try to help them? You wouldn’t yell insults at them, would you?

I cannot count the amount of times that I have been blind to the gift around me. It was often that I was in a low state and totally consumed by my own low level thinking. I could feel a fog around me that blotted everything out. I knew I ‘should’ be grateful but I couldn’t feel it. I had a blindfold on.

This is why things like a gratitude journal and counting your blessings practice actually work – they help take the blindfold off so we can see the world more clearly, with all it’s blessings.

Would you like to peek out from under the blindfold? Our Facebook group: Get the Gratitude does just that. Just ask to join!



  1. great post. I must admit that seeing so many posts of yours everywhere I am starting to peak out from behind the blindfold. I don’t think of myself as a negative person at all, but just felt like I didn’t have time to think grateful thoughts all the time. And I must admit I also have a bit of resistance about repressing the tough stuff to go on about how wonderful life is!! But I am starting to have spontatenously grateful thoughts and that is really nice.

    • I love that you are having spontaneous grateful thoughts!
      I promise though that it is not about repressing the tough stuff. Life can have it’s challenges (like everyday getting little ones out the front door!!!). In the that moment, depending on our thinking, it’s may not be pleasant. But that is only for 1 hour max in the morning. If we continue to think about it, often all day……replaying what happened, then we are actually repressing life! We are taking ourselves away from what is happening now and failing to see the wonder of what is! This is the blindfold.
      I think another blogpost is brewing!

  2. I’ll give you that people aren’t ungrateful on purpose, but even if they aren’t, isn’t there a basic amount of decency that we can expect even if they are struggling with whatever it is that is bothering them?
    Isn’t that part of being grown-up? (Not talking about teenagers here)
    I do love the credit you’re giving people! 🙂
    Tamara recently posted…If life hands you lemons…My Profile

    • My friends boggle at that part of my personality too! I simply don’t expect anything from anyone then wait to be delighted (which is more often the case!). And yes, I will raise my daughter to surprise people. I too, deeply enjoy going above and beyond to surprise people with manners, helpfulness and politeness as it brightens all our days! I do it for fun!

  3. It is always so much has better for everyone to look for the good. Always look for the helpers I think Mr. Roger’s is quoted as saying.

    • I am not familiar with this quote: I will have to look it up!
      Thank you!

  4. Someone once said that if we threw all of our problems into a pile with others’, we’d quite quickly take back our own problems when we saw what others were dealing with. I try to practice compassion and gratitude as much as I can.


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