I had a client who had built up an image of what his marriage and family would look like when he was lucky enough to be in that stage of his life.
Some of the pictures were based on how he was brought up (either moving towards or away from that style of parenting) and his personal preferences that had built up over time.
My client’s family did not match the pictures in his head. Primarily because they were real! Every moment, unconsciously, he would compare the pictures in his head with what was happening with his family and the disconnect was causing him pain.
Isn’t it interesting that faced with this situation, most of us try to change the external, the real live people, rather than tackle the images in our mind? Wow! Thoughts appear to be more real than reality! You know that is not going to end well!!
Of course you know how the story ends:
it is the story that we all share;
the song that we all sing;
the dream we all dream.
The question is, do we continue to dream or do we wake up?
Your family is not “supposed” to look this way or that way. They simply are. And as we know from our little ones, they may be one thing in the morning and another in the afternoon.
Our children are a thesis on the nature of change yet it is a lesson that many of us struggle with or attempt to ignore.
See the two images you have of the world: the internal and the external. One of thought, the other reality as you are currently playing it. Choose wisely. ❤︎
“Waking up this morning I smile. 24 brand new hours before me. I vow to live fully each moment and to look at all beings with eyes of compassion”.
Thích Nhất Hạnh